Diary of a Furloughed Fed: Day 16 -- The end

While driving last week out to apple picking territory, we spied a number of signs that announced  "Deer crossing next mile".  How do the deer know where to cross?  Why are there no stoplights?

When girls get bored, girls go to lunch then get mani-pedis.  I got brave and went dark polish on those old toes.

But wait, there is news -- the Tea Party has caved.  With Boehner declaring just minutes ago that the government should re-open tomorrow, I am preparing to return to work on Thursday, Friday for sure.  The votes in House and Senate are tonight.  Affordable Health Care will endure.  However, I worry that we will face this all again in the new year.  This is not a time for congratulations.  It is only a time to sigh and catch our breath.

It is very humbling to be forced out of work; to be sidelined.  I had to put my trust in my team.  They did good, but I certainly missed the action and the influence.

Diary of a Furloughed Fed: Day 11 - Glimmers of hope?

I woke this morning to an 8AM session with my trainer and a dwindling list of "things to do". Depressive thoughts are starting to set in -- I'm easily upset about nothing and I "just want to be alone", as Marlene Detrick was alleged to say.  But a glimmer of hope is on the horizon -- an audience yelled at Ted Cruz's ranting and the two sides are talking in private instead of just shouting over the air waves.  How can health care for millions of people who neither can't afford it or who have been turned down because of pre-existing conditions be "the worse thing that has ever happened to this nation since slavery?"   Is there no empathy left in people?  Do they really think our society can thrive without a safety net to ensure the safety, health and education of vulnerable citizens?  Don't they understand Maslow's hierarchy of needs?  It's useless for me to carry on....I will wait for the outcome.  No matter what the solution, I will return to work eventually.

Not knowing when I will go back to work is at the root of my frustration.  Not working is fine.  I've had time to do all those chores I never had time to do; however, I need a purpose, and purpose takes time to develop.  It's like living in a purgatory; a place in between, being neither fish nor fowl.  I'm ready to begin studying for my sailing license.  I've accumulated the required helm experience hours.  It will take 3-6 months of almost full time work to prepare -- both online and classroom sessions.  Living from day to day as I am now, makes the needed commitment shaky.  Without some solid blocks of time, I won't do well.  I know myself -- immersion is my learning style.

Last week the weather here in DC was perfect for sailing; however, the water continues to allude us. We are waiting for the delivery of the mainsail and the completion of the refinishing of the boat's sole (the internal flooring).   Looks like we will leave Forte Vento on the hard until spring and take delivery then.

This week the weather is wet, clammy and gray.  Very apropos for the current government shutdown situation and it saddens me. Perhaps, as Annie sings, "Tomorrow, tomorrow the sun will come out."  I can hope.

Diary of a Furloughed Fed: Day 8 Frustrations

We filled the weekend with apple picking, wine tasting, and cooking with apples--apple butter, tarts and muffins.  It kept our minds off the situation,  allowed us to share time with our also furloughed friend  and got us out of the house into the sunny countryside of Virginia.  However, when Monday came I smacked right into the face of the government shutdown as John went to work and I found myself with time for the laundry and a few errands.  At lunch with Justine and another furloughed friend our talk fixated on what might happen, dwindling resources, and wishing we were back on the job.  It was difficult to talk about much else.  Even though the vote to give up back pay was passed and signed, essential and furloughed people won't get that pay until we are all back at work.  We broke our obsessive talk with an afternoon movie, Gravity, that took us far away from our troubles for a few hours.

People are starting to worry about next month's lease or home payments and starting to live off their credit cards.  I worry as well for them and for our work which is "on hold" as deployment deadlines that affect our ~68 offices around the world slip by.  My small staff of 11 "excepted" people is definitely barely able to "keep the lights on" and hoping a disaster doesn't hit us anywhere. 

I feel we are but pawns in a great battle and must remind myself that it is an important battle.  The Affordable Health Care Act was passed by Congress and declared Constitutional by the Supreme Court -- to not fund it is close to an act of treason by the right wing extremists.  I also believe that if Obama was not an African American their vitriolic hate language would be muted and there would be much less strength in the grass roots population that seem willing to follow the Koch brothers and Edwin Meese to the brink.  Don't they understand that the ACA is benefiting them already?  My girlfriend, a runner in excellent health at 55, was denied coverage and had to live without insurance for over a year because of a comment a doctor wrote on her chart.  Only after she became employed by a firm that provided health care coverage did she get relief.  Today, that would never have happened.  Denying coverage is illegal because of the ACA.  How is that taking away her freedom by the government? 

Diary of a Furlooughed Fed: Day 4_Home Improvement

I felt like a resurrected old lady this morning after my 8 AM training session so with no money, water bottle or game  plan I took off for a Potomac River run.  I did have my music that I had just downloaded from my updated music in the cloud.  Billy Joel and Cindy Lauper make me feel invincible.

I ran east on route 50 then passed through the Iwo Jima Memorial.  Hooked a loop to route 110 that rounds Arlington Cemetery.  Once on top in front of the cemetery entrance, I crossed the street, walking to catch my breath and headed for the Potomac.  By the time I was running toward Roosevelt Island, my body began to tell me what I fool I had become.  But, I persevered with a combination of   short sprints and long walks to make it back to Roslyn and finally back on route 50 east to home.

Being 66 is like being a kid -- you can't judge what you are capable.  Kids grow stronger, able to do what they couldn't do a few years ago.  I can't do what I did just of few years ago.  A bad case of reverse expectations.  I sweat, I sighed, but I did make it back home.  It's amazing how good a very long hot shower can feel at 11 in the morning.

The main project today was "home improvement"-- I installed small soft close mechanisms make your less than high end cabinets behave like designer selections.  Husband gave little guidance as I struggled with drill that was supposed to work around close quarter corners. 

I pushed aside this "guy" technology, found a good sized Phillips screw driver, a hammer and tap screw and began an exercise in upper body and arm action.  Within three hours, I installed these clever mechanisms in 28 cabinets. I was about to put them on the bathroom cabinets  (the last six), but I my body gave out once again.  Tomorrow morning will see them done is less than a hour. 

The work was extremely satisfying.  I just wish my federal job was always this satisfying with results that are so evident.     Ahhhhhh......

Diary of a Furloughed Fed: Day 2 (actually Day3)

Day 2 is actually Day 3 according to the news reports-- Monday was a half day so I stand corrected.  Anyway, it was technology day. After promising myself to do it forever,  I took the plunge.  A  bit of research, downloading and experimentation, I now have access to my contacts, calendars, photos and my music on all my "devices" using Apple's iCloud technology.  The only kink is that my iPhone is too aged (all of 2011) to do iCloud so tomorrow I'll upgrade to an iPhone 5. A walk up to the Apple store (sometimes I just need to talk with a real human being) was needed to figure out my iPhone situation. 

 

A furlough day made this possible.  Normally, there are too many more important chores to do.  I felt like I've caught a break. 

 

A note from my business partner was most encouraging.  She told me to enjoy not having commitments and meetings and that having total control over my own time is a most terrific alternative to the past 40 years of work.  I'm not sure I agree yet, but in another day or two, I  may agree with her.

 

Had a small dinner party - more of a picnic fest - roasted BBQ chicken wings and Caesar salad complete with homemade dressings and croutons. The oldest grandson, now a college freshman at GW, just two metro stops away, and a furloughed girlfriend joined us.  It felt good to have the time to cook up a fun meal.  There was nothing left - not even a crouton. 

 

More tomorrow....looks like we are in this for some time.

 



Diary of a Furloughed Fed: Day 1

Today is all about adjustment and restructuring. Yesterday, there was no time to do all those things I keep telling myself I should do.  Today, there is all the time, so now I have to figure out what should be done.  Where do I start?  Do I really want to do all those "should do" chores?  Are they really important?  Who cares what I do? 

How do I make the days meaningful -- after all this is not a vacation where meaningful action is sauntering down quaint streets and souvenir hunting.  This is a furlough -- time off with no pay -- so my favorite pastime, recreational shopping is out of the question.

My answer is to take action -- "just do it" like the Nike ad says.  So I did and I'm able to say that at 4PM, I'm sane.  I:

• Figured out how to stay connected to those left at work outside of our official communications channels.  Just knowing what is happening, even if I can't do anything about anything, helps to keep me grounded.
• Didn't oversleep.  I gifted myself an extra 20 minutes, but then got out of bed to start the day. 
• Went for a run after coffee and a quick scan of the New York Times.  It was delightful to not have to wait until the weekend and after work for exercise.  Fresh cool air and sunshine made me happy, if sweaty.
• Tackled a few chores of that long list of "things that should be done."  I feel like I have accomplished something during the day, so there is not fog enveloping my head to stunt my ability to think positively.
• Took a trip to see what was up.  The metro and mall were sparsely populated and the buildings, monuments and parks were locked. Many security guards on Segway's hovered around.  Gave me the feeling that we are truly "locked out" of our own town.
• Grocery shopped in the afternoon.  That's what retired people do so I thought I practice.  I was able to test the fruit for ripeness without being jostled.

Today's news didn't give me much hope that we'll be going back to work this week. 

Vacation views

Several readers asked for pictures that illustrate our recent trip.  Well, here they are -- the good, the bad and the silly in no particular order.  We started out in Milan (2 days), drove north west to Lake Orte (3 days) where the Italians go to avoid Lake Como; then drove east to the medieval city of Bergamo (4 days) that included a one day side trip to Verona to see the ancient coliseum and have the most fabulous meal of our trip; and then drove back to Milan (2 days).  We only got lost big time once -- when I tried to navigate with three maps that all used different names for the same streets.  Very Italian :-) 

Furloughed!

We escaped Italy one day before the Italian government went into its annual crisis when Berlusconi's mad men withdrew from the Parliamentary coalition government.  We landed at Dulles airport only three days away from our own government crisis.  So, this morning, I found myself along with 58 of my staff saying goodbye to a skeletal crew of 11 who are charged with keeping the electrons flowing and the core systems operating.

I am now officially unemployed by Congressional decree. It's no longer an abstract issue for me.  It became personal today.  A surprisingly sad and eerie feeling overcame me as I walked to the elevator, watching myself leave as if I was having an out of body experience.  I have no idea when I might return.   I have a job, but then I don't.  Financially, I'm fine, but I do worry about the many staff who are single, or more seriously parents with no other sources of income to assist in keeping it together during the shutdown. 

I fear we are in for a long shutdown.  Neither Obama nor Boehner seem open to compromise, appearing to intensely dislike each other as evidenced by their adamant public pronouncements that make private discussions next to impossible.  When Newt and  Bill went head to head in 1995-1996, the government was out for three weeks -- and they talked with each other daily -- and were careful not to say anything publicly that might harm private discussions.  At our last senior staff meeting this morning, many including myself were not hopeful that an agreement would be reached  quickly and predicted that we will remain shut out until the debt ceiling is exceeded on October 17, pushing the economy back into a recession.

We are hostages in a game not of our own making.  We are the pawns in a grand chess match where  little adult leadership is evident.  Ours lives have been abstracted to the point that the impact of it all on our lives is neither visible nor felt to the game players.  It would have been better if the shutdown had included stopping congressional salaries, the mail and the distribution of social security checks.  Then, at least, the rest of the country would feel what I feel and there would be a realistic incentive to reach a workable compromise.

Where do I stand on the situation? The Affordable Health Care Act should be implemented.  It was passed by Congress and upheld by the Supreme Court. Every adult American should be required to carry health insurance, just like we are required to have auto insurance or homeowners insurance.  Is it a perfect solution?  No--but we need to give the law a chance to become reality and then modify it where the evidence says changes are needed.  Right now it's all about hurly opinions and conjecture into the air. 

The last shutdown cost the US economy $2 billion.  Enough said.  From Washington DC -- the land of much silliness.