Recovery Blues

Ten days since the arm surgery -- I'm resigned to float above the reality of life -- an out of body experience.  Emails continue to trickle in from work, but my team seems to be handling it all quite well.  Am I irrelevant?  Does atree falling in the woods make a sound if no one is around to hear it?  I'm feeling like that damn tree. 

After watching every minute of the Macy's Thanksgiving Day parade, I had to get off the couch or go bonkers. Despite John's commands to stay where I was and mend, I opted for getting off the couch to help with dinner preparations.  Result -- shoulder pain exploded on me last night despite having taken Advil and carefully wearing my sling all day and night.  This morning I popped a Percoset.  I was desperate.  It's time for another one!

I haven't been running around by any means.  I've tried to be a good patient.  In the past two days, I've read a mountain of magazines and newspapers.  I've blogged, sorted my four inch high in box, paid bills, talked with relatives and eaten my way through an abundance of tasty nibbles. I want to "getting moving" but I tire easily.  What happened to my Energizer Bunny?  I even napped after exhausting myself setting theThanksgiving Dinner table. 

What's the use in getting dressed when you can't go out, but that brings me to the simple tasks that bring me to tears. Ever tried to wash your right armpit with your right arm or hook your bra with one hand? The hair dryer is a banned appliance as it requires my left arm to rise up above my head.  My hair is early "mess". I can't lift my left arm to pull on a sweater or shirt.  I can only zip up a sweat shirt.  I can't wear my normal slacks or jeans- it takes two good arms to pull and zip them up. I've succumbed to sweat and yoga pants pull ups with elastic waists.  At least they are black and not the horrid pastel colors with matching sequend tops of those blue haired ladies standing in line at the 5:00 2 for 1 seating at restaurants.  Just thinking about them depresses me because I turned 66 on Monday.  I'm now beyond all the age categories - you know, the ones you have to check off on marketing surveys. I've become irrelevant to marketeers -- except, of course, to those hawking hearing aids, laxatives, adult diapers, scooters and denture gel.

Monday I go back to work, for which, I will be eternally grateful.  I'm ready to be back in the muck of the "reality of life".  I'll be easy to recognize.  I'll be the one with sling and sweats in heels.  Wish me luck. 

Surgery Plus 7 Days

Light typing is now allowed; however, I'm still sling bound and feeling like an elephant with a broken snout.  Our attempt to escape to the ocean for a week of R&R was a bust -- the weather was cold, gray and windy.  We couldn't get warm. On top of it all, John's cough is turning into a three week affair and I caught it.  What a way to spend a birthday!   After one night, we bagged it and drove home to blue skies and a cozy fireplace. 

I've got six little stitches scattered about the shoulder.  Swelling is minimal but the shoulder reminds me of a lamb roast after John's plugged it with garlic cloves and spinkled it with rosemary.  Am trying to stay off the "dizzy" drugs, but had to return to them last night.  My expectations about "getting back to normal" have been somewhat unrealistic. John just rolls his eyes when I complain that the sling is getting in my way.

48 hours later

Typing with one hand is required. That is a slow and error prone process. The good news is that both my rotator cuff and bicep in my left arm are repaired and in time, with rehab, should be better than new. The bad news is that my stomach doen't like percoset, so much of what I have eaten in the past 48 hours erupted from me.  Maybe I will lose a few inches around my ever expanding waist.

No reaching, stretching or lifting is allowed.  I am condemmed to pull-up pants and front zippered sweats. Nurse John is attentive and helpful. (He thinks my breasts are swingingly handsome.)

 I hate being or feeling helpless!  I don't think he is having a fun time with his patient.  :-)

Fixing the left shoulder

We survived hurricane Sandy quite well -- Forte Vento was unharmed as well was our condo.  Can't say the same for my daughter's family home (they were out of power for a week) or their sweet little summer place in Seaside Height Park across from Tom's River (they lost all the interior, but the place remained on its cinder blocks foundation).

My energy now turns to my left shoulder.  Tomorrow my rotator cuff will be repaired  After 10 days without a couple of Ibuprofen every night, pain rips across the my back and shoulders every time I move.  It's amazing what the drug was able to mask.  As all the birthday cards remind us -- getting old is not for sissies.  I have high hopes that repairs are possible and that I'll be able to pull lines without pain.  There's physical therapy after the surgery, but, as always, I'm determined.  If I can't have strength at least I want the lack of pain.  I'm keeping my fingers crossed.

I arrive at 5:30AM at the hospital, John at my side.  Surgery is scheduled for 7:30AM and I'll be home in bed sometime in the afternoon.  Hope I get good drugs!